Faith Journey: The Bass Made Me a UU

I grew up in a house with no religious denomination. Instead of a religious basis for my life, mine was music.

My dad introduced me to classic rock, blues, and protest folk music. My grandfather was a music teacher, so it was only natural that my sister and I would start music lessons. Over the years, I expanded my musical world: playing guitar, keyboard, and other instruments with bands, performing solo acoustic concerts, and in pit orchestras for musical theater. Music became part of who I am.

In my 30s, I started dating an amazing woman named Johanna (spoiler alert, we’re married now). One of our shared interests was playing music. She played piano with the band Kaleidoscope at the Unitarian Universalist Church West in Brookfield, Wisconsin. I went to a service to hear the band play, and they were good—really good. They also were clearly having fun.

A few weeks later, during a rehearsal at Johanna’s home, they started to play a song I’ve always loved, “Dancing in the Streets” by Martha and the Vandellas. There was a problem though: they were playing it without a bass guitar player, so I grabbed one and plugged in. There are some things in the world that are just plain wrong to me, and playing Motown without a bass is high on that list.

We had a great time playing the service a few weeks later, and I was asked to play the next month and the month after that. Every time I was at the Unitarian Universalist church, I felt welcome in a way I never had before. Until then, I didn’t truly understand what Unitarian Universalism was all about, but taking the time to learn changed me on a fundamental level. This was a place where it was okay that I wasn’t sure what I believed, and a place where I didn’t have to hide that I am a bisexual man. We are bound together in our beliefs that all people are inherently worthy, and that the world can be changed for the better.

I still remember the day I told Johanna I wanted to officially join the church. She teared up and told me she had never planned to ask me to join. If I were to become a member of a UU church, it would be for my own reasons and on my own terms. It was.

I never expected a church to be a major part of my life. Unitarian Universalism, however, is so much more than a church to me. It’s a place where everyone belongs and it’s okay to be who you are. As a member of the church I have guidance, I have music, and I have an expanded chosen family. This journey I’m still on started many years ago with Motown and a bass guitar.